I Lived With My Man Before Marriage – 9 Benefits
Are you wondering if there are any benefits of living together before marriage?
Or do you feel living together is magic best saved for after you say “I do”?
Sorry to burst your bubble.
No special magic happens when you start living together after marriage.
And even if there is magic, it will finally die down.
And everything becomes routine and back to earth.
Of which some of the magic might be unpleasant surprises.
So whether you live together now or wait until you’re married, you’d still have problems like every average couple.
But living with your partner before marriage has some advantages.
I lived with my husband before we got married.
So I have first-hand experience of the benefits of living together before marriage.
Let’s talk about them.
9 Benefits of Living Together Before Marriage
When planning your life with someone, you should know a lot about them.
But how much can you know when you live apart?
People are great at showing you their good sides.
But you’d only know their other side when you live with them for several months.
And that can help you decide if you want to spend forever with them or part ways.
The points below show you the pros of living with your partner before marriage.
1. You’ll know each other more
When you live with someone you’re planning to marry, you’d know them on a deeper level.
Don’t ever think you know enough about them because you’ve been on several dates.
Or maybe spend some weekends together.
Knowing someone is seeing them in all their glory.
Have you seen them mad?
Are they as easy-going as they seemed when you started dating?
Or do they fuss about everything?
And is it their way or the highway?
Maybe they’re the kind that breaks stuff when angry.
Or do they find better ways to handle their emotions.
If you’ve not seen your partner angry before marriage, you have lots of unpleasant surprises ahead of you.
But if you’ve lived together, you’d know whether you can live with it.
And if they’re just so sweet, and their existence makes you happier every day, you’ll know that too.
2. You’d know if you’re compatible or not when you live together before marriage
Another great reason to live together before marriage is for compatibility benefits.
To be compatible with your partner means to agree with each other and live peacefully together.
You don’t want to marry someone you disagree with because it can worsen your future.
But if you try, you can learn how to be more agreeable with each other.
Also, you must be sexually compatible.
Suppose intimacy feels like a chore.
Or your partner likes to do it often, but you hardly want it.
It means you’re sexually incompatible.
Of course, there are times when you’re not in the mood.
But if you don’t like to do it as often as your partner does.
Or you say, “Is it food?” when your partner asks for sex, you may not be sexually compatible.
And it would help if your partner knew this before marriage.
Because lack of intimacy is one of the main reasons marriages end.
And if it’s something you both can work on before marriage, you’d do it.
3. Living together before marriage can help you know if you’d love to marry your partner
Living with your partner before marriage can help you see if you have a future together.
You can’t fake if you’ve lived together for more than 4 or 6 months.
You’ve seen each other at your best and worst.
What about them makes you want to love them forever?
Or are there things you can’t stand, no matter what?
Maybe your partner was pleased to do your laundry the first weekend you spent together.
But now you’re living together, they can’t stand to see your dirty clothes.
Or they insist you use a coaster every time you get a drink.
Some people have weird OCDs.
And you’d know more about them when you live with them.
And it can help you decide on the future.
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4. It shows that your bond is strong
Living with your partner before marriage is a way to keep skeptics out.
You know your friends and family members who feel they know what’s best for you?
Or they don’t like your partner for some reason and would try to break your relationship.
Moving in together shows them that your bond is strong.
And they can’t touch you guys.
It doesn’t mean it would change their view (that’s unimportant), but it keeps them off your back.
11 Tips To Keep People Out Of Your Relationship.
5. You’ll learn to work together when living together before marriage
Another great benefit of living together before marriage is that you’d learn to work as a team.
You can decide how you split bills, do house chores, etc.
But if your partner is the kind that leaves all the responsibility to you, you’d know and decide what’s best for you.
Because they can only pretend to be helpful for so long.
As partners, you should know your respective tasks in the home.
And also be willing to help each other when needed.
But if you only discover your spouse is unhelpful after marriage, you might be unhappy.
6. You’d see likely deal breakers when you live together before marriage
You have your deal-breakers about who you plan to spend the rest of your life with.
Your deal-breakers are the things you can’t stand, no matter what.
But you’d hardly see these red flags when dating and living apart.
Do you know if your partner drinks, pukes, and passes out in it?
Or do they spend lots of money without thinking?
Or maybe they demand that you appear like a dog once they call your name? That’s a big red flag you must avoid at all costs.
What if they snore a lot, and you can’t stand snoring?
I don’t think snoring is a good reason not to marry someone, but you have choices.
And if your deal-breakers are petty stuff like:
- putting the toilet seat up or down;
- pressing the toothpaste from the middle or bottom,
- keeping coffee mugs face up or down,
you should be able to compromise and live together in peace.
7. You’d get comfortable and be yourself.
When you live together before marriage, you get relaxed and free with each other.
And when you get married, you’ll keep living like you did yesterday.
But if you haven’t lived together before marriage, you’d be under pressure to act like a wife.
Let me tell you, you don’t need to act a certain way as a spouse.
You are still that beautifully flawed human that your partner met and loves.
And it’s easier to be this person when you have lived together before getting married.
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8. Your chance to live a quiet life without kids for now
If you plan to have kids, they most likely come after you’re married because biology is not usually on our side as women.
And kids change the dynamic of relationships.
When you’re living together as a young kidless couple, you can have all the fun you want.
And when you get married, though you’ll miss your hangouts, you’d also have the “we did that” moments.
9. Breaking up while dating is less painful than divorce
If you marry someone you don’t know, the marriage may end in divorce.
And divorce is costly and difficult, especially when you have kids.
The part that scares me the most about divorce is how the kids cope with living with only one parent and visiting the other.
Lots of things can go wrong when a family splits up.
So living together before marriage can help you see this early.
And you can end the relationship and move on with your life.
Conclusion on pros of living together before marriage
So those are the nine benefits of living together before marriage.
It’s a chance to know your partner more and see if they’re someone you’d love to be with for life.
No special magic makes things easier because you began living together after your wedding.
You should know as much as possible about your partner before you say, “I do.”
I hope this post is helpful.
Please share it on social media.
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