While writing a different post, I realized I’m still mad at one of my ex-boyfriends.
I get angry whenever I remember him because I was naive when dating him.
He wasn’t a completely horrible person because we all have some good and bad in us.
However, I remember how he took me for granted and the things I allowed while dating him.
I’ve tried to forget him, but I’m still mad at him.
And I think it’s normal to feel this way, especially if you’ve dated several people.
So this post will cover why you’re still angry at your ex-boyfriend.
And how to quit being angry at him.
A brief story of why I’m still mad at my ex-boyfriend
My ex-boyfriend and I often argued because he hardly had time for me.
He only wanted me when I didn’t want him.
We broke up and got back together several times.
Sometimes we broke up over the phone, and we’d make up a few hours later.
Or we’d take some days apart and get back together.
My ex hardly made plans to see me.
Instead, he waits till other people he prefers bail on him.
I was his last resort.
Don’t ever let anyone make you their last resort.
And my fault was that I depended on him too much for fun.
I loved to look good and have a great time with him.
I didn’t enjoy my life on my own or with my friends as much as I depended on him for fun.
So seeing me started to feel like a chore to him.
Then we broke up and got back together again.
But I noticed he started seeing someone else.
And from pictures at his place, I saw he was doing all these things with her that he never did with me.
And the worst part was he wanted me to be okay with him dating both of us. Or cheating on her with me.
Anyway, we broke up again—this time for good.
And I’m still mad at him.
So from my experience, here are possible reasons you’re still mad at your ex-boyfriend:
Why you’re still angry at your ex-boyfriend
You’re mad at your ex because they betrayed your trust.
Maybe you were faithful, and your ex-boyfriend cheated on you.
It’s expected that you’d still be mad at him.
It doesn’t mean you still have feelings for him, as some say.
But it’s possible you still do.
And that’s okay.
But most of the time, when someone betrays your trust, you can stay mad at them for years.
You’ve grown and know better now.
Another reason you’re still mad at your ex-boyfriend is that you know better now.
Maybe while dating them, you didn’t know what you know now.
So sometimes you think, if I knew better, I wouldn’t have allowed this and that.
If I knew what I know now, I wouldn’t have allowed some things that happened in my past relationships.
Maybe I wouldn’t have dated my ex-boyfriend in the first place.
But it’s all in the past.
Someone is treating you better.
This is funny because normally, we should be happy, right?
But you’d see the difference when someone else starts treating you kindly, lovingly, and with respect.
And it makes you look back and get mad for not seeing how badly your ex-boyfriend treated you.
Sometimes I’m shocked that there are still some good men in this world.
Thankfully I didn’t allow my relationship with my ex to affect how I view men.
If not, I wouldn’t have met my husband and had this wonderful relationship with him.
I’m sure there are more reasonable reasons why you’re mad at your ex-boyfriend.
But those are the few I’ve experienced.
Please read The Real Reason You Can’t Stop Hating Your Ex for more.
Now let’s discuss how to quit staying mad at your ex.
How to stop being mad at your ex-boyfriend
Forgive your ex-boyfriend and yourself
Whatever happens in a relationship is never one partner’s fault.
So own your part in the relationship.
Forgive yourself for allowing things to happen the way they did.
Also, forgive him for treating you like crap.
Forgiveness is for you, not for him.
When you forgive him, you can move on.
But the thing is, I don’t take my advice, especially with this particular ex-boyfriend.
Whenever I think of him, I add some bad word before his name.
But I’ll try to forgive him and myself to move on.
Gosh, it’s been years, I shouldn’t be so mad at him, but I still am.
So let’s do this together.
Contact them if that works for you.
You can do that if you prefer to contact your ex-boyfriend and clear the air.
But I prefer to forgive them from a distance.
I don’t like awkward conversations.
Also, I don’t even have my ex’s contact anymore.
I don’t know his whereabouts because he’s not on social media.
And I blocked him on LinkedIn. Hehe.
But do what works for you.
Make sure you don’t get carried away with this newly reignited friendship.
If you’re not careful, staying friends with an ex can ruin your current relationship.
So be cautious when contacting and making up with an ex.
Focus on your current relationship and enjoy it
Enjoy if you’re currently in a good relationship where your partner loves you.
Don’t focus on how mad you are at your ex.
Also, since someone else sees what he never saw in you, reciprocate the love and stay happy.
Staying mad at your ex can distract you from enjoying your current relationship.
Also, staying angry at your ex may hinder you from seeing the good a new lover can offer.
Stop letting your ex live rent-free in your head.
You’d remember your ex, but maybe change how you react to the thought of them.
Please read How to Stop Being Angry at Your Ex for professional advice.
Conclusion on why you’re still mad at your ex
I can’t guarantee that you’d never think of your ex.
But it would be best if you changed how you respond to the thought of them.
It won’t happen overnight, especially if the relationship with your ex was long.
So take one day at a time, and forgive yourself for letting anyone treat you like your ex did.
And moving forward, never let anyone treat you that way again.
Also, don’t view other men with the lens you use for your ex-boyfriend.
This can help you open your mind and receive love from a good person.
I hope this helps.
Please share this post; it would mean everything to me.
How did you stop being mad at your ex?
Please share your tips in the comments.
Thanks for reading.
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