Are you constantly fighting with your husband over sharing household responsibilities?
In this post, I’ll show you how to get your husband to help with chores.
And we’ll also discuss reasons why your husband doesn’t help with house chores.
Reasons why your husband doesn’t do chores
First, let’s discuss why your man doesn’t do housework:
Maybe you never asked him to do chores at the beginning.
The truth is, some of us never asked our men to help with chores at the beginning of staying together.
Maybe you lived together before marriage and never asked him to help with chores.
In this case, he got used to not doing chores.
And now you’re overwhelmed doing it all by yourself.
Or you cohabited before marriage, and he told you straight up he won’t do chores, but you married him anyway.
This is a red flag if chores are essential to you.
So it means you saw it, but you ignored it.
Or you only started living together after marriage, to discover he won’t help with chores.
No matter how you got there, you can try the tips below to get your husband to do chores.
You want the chores to be done only your way.
Another reason your man doesn’t do chores is that you only want it your way.
No matter how good a man does his chores, some women would still find something wrong with it.
They want to stand over him and show him exactly how to do it so they will be satisfied.
Don’t look at me.
Those women are all over social media.
They brag about how they scream at their men, who can never do any task right.
If we scream and nag our men about not doing their chores right, they wouldn’t want to do any chores.
Think about it.
If your man screams at you for not doing chores exactly how he does them, would you want to do any more chores?
You’d leave them to the expert(him) to do.
That’s why your man isn’t helping with house chores.
Please read 11 Steps To Stop Being A Mom To Your Husband.
You always redo his chores.
So I saw a Reddit post where a lady said she was sick, and her husband helped clean the house.
She got up and started redoing the chores as soon as he got into bed.
That’s just cringey.
We’ve all done it at some point in our relationships.
But we should stop redoing our partner’s chores after they’ve completed them.
It says we’re ungrateful and our partners are inadequate.
If you want your man to help with housework, stop redoing his chores.
Or else, you’d be fighting like every other day.
Which is bad for your marriage and mental health.
And worst of all, you’d be exhausted doing your and his chores.
He doesn’t know how to do house chores.
It might be challenging for you if your hubby doesn’t know how to do chores.
Some parents never teach their kids simple household responsibilities.
Now the problem is, does he want to learn to help his wife?
Or does he think housework is a woman’s job?
Keep reading for tips to get your husband to do house chores.
How to get your husband to help with chores – 10 tips
We are all different, so it affects how we operate.
While you may want something done right now and exactly how you do it.
Your partner might prefer to do it later and in their way.
Do you know what’s important?
Your husband did the chore.
So here are some tips to get your hubby to do chores:
1. Share chores based on your schedules
Find a way to share chores based on your schedule.
Does your husband work from 9 to 5?
My husband is a graduate student.
So he does most of his chores on the weekends.
He cleans the bathroom, does laundry, and grocery shopping.
The only thing he might move into the week is folding the clothes.
Which I sometimes do with him.
But he won’t be mad if I didn’t.
Are you a stay-at-home wife and mom?
I’m a stay-at-home mom.
I work from home too.
So I do chores based on my schedule.
I cook, sweep, mop, and care for the kids.
And when I’m cooking, and I need my hubby to help out, I ask him.
And he helps.
So it’s okay to ask your man for help.
And maybe if your hubby is usually at home on weekends, you can transfer childcare to him.
Dads are good at caring for kids too.
Please read these posts:
- I Want To Be A Stay-At-Home Wife – What To Know, Pros & Cons
- 7 Things For Stay-at-home Wives To Do To Reduce Stress.
2. Share chores based on your strengths
Another way to get your man to help with chores is to share house responsibilities based on your strengths.
So who cooks better between you both?
Let the better cook make the meals.
As I said earlier, I cook most of the time.
But my husband is quick with grocery shopping. So he does that.
And we don’t have an in-unit laundry.
So hubby prefers to go to the laundry room while I do other things.
You need to look at your strengths and share chores accordingly.
3. How to get your husband to help with chores? Ask for his help
Whether you share duties based on a list or not, it won’t hurt to ask your husband for help.
You can say, “sweetie, please chop these vegetables,” or “season your meat,” whatever.
Or “Babe, I’m not feeling okay today; please, can you vacuum?”
It’s how you say it that will get him to help you.
And most of the time, guys help when we ask them nicely.
So try that.
4. Also, offer to help your husband.
While you ask your man to help with your chores, remember to offer to help him too.
Maybe he’s doing laundry and falls asleep.
If you can tell he’s tired, you can offer to transfer the clothes from the washer to the dryer.
Sometimes my husband falls asleep in the living room while doing laundry.
And he’d sometimes ask me to help put the next load.
But most times, he wakes up to continue.
And sometimes, I let him continue his nap while I transfer clothes from the washer to the dryer.
Then he continues when he’s had enough rest.
Helping your partner do their chores once in a while helps you appreciate each other more.
5. How to get your husband to help with chores? Trust him to do his tasks.
Another thing you must remember about sharing household chores with your husband is to trust him to do his chores.
We all have ways we do things.
Your way of doing things would be different from your man’s.
But it doesn’t mean his way is wrong.
Yes, it may look like men don’t know how to do chores.
It’s our biased thinking that women are better at chores based on gender roles, etc.
But some men are good at chores, and they do them based on how they were taught.
So please don’t stand over him asking him to do it your way.
Or saying he has to do them right now or else.
You’d only be creating trouble in your marriage.
6. Do your chores without making everyone uncomfortable
Also, to get your man to help with tasks, do yours without grumbling or nagging.
I used to do that.
When I’m doing chores, I expect my husband to get busy too.
So I’d be mad at him for sitting down.
And I’d nag him to help or do something.
But when he asks what I need him to do, I’m already too mad to think straight.
And we end up arguing over nothing.
So do your chores.
And if your hubby wants to sit and watch TV or do whatever, let him be.
And if you need his help, please ask him nicely.
But thinking your husband will jump and start doing chores because you’re nagging him will make you angry.
Because he won’t.
7. Remember to thank him for doing his tasks.
Also, when your hubby does his chores, thank him.
Some women complain that their husbands want them to acknowledge and thank them for doing chores.
And other women on social media joined in condemning the husband for wanting some gratitude.
There’s always more context to these stories.
But it’s okay to thank your partner for doing their fair share of housework.
It doesn’t take anything from you or the marriage.
Instead, it helps you appreciate each other more.
8. Stop dragging your husband on social media for not doing chores.
If you want your hubby to help with chores, talk to him.
Instead of reporting him to strangers on social media.
People who help you shame your husband on social media only make things worse for you.
Because after reading their comments, you’d be mad at your hubby.
And start dealing with him based on their biased and horrible advice.
If you’re talking to strangers online, you’re not communicating with the most important person (your husband).
So communicate with your partner.
And find ways to do chores together without the influence of angry social media users.
9. Show him how to do chores
If your guy doesn’t know how to do chores and is willing to learn from you, please teach him.
It may seem awkward to show an adult how to do basic housework.
But better to have a spouse that wants to learn so he can pull his weight around the house than one who thinks chores are for women alone.
10. Seek professional help
Lastly, seek professional help if you’ve tried everything to get your hubby to help with housework, and nothing works.
An unbiased professional might help you find better ways to approach house chores.
Boom! 10 simple ways to get your husband to help with chores.
I hope you find them helpful.
Please share this post; it would mean everything to me.
See you next time.
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